One of the more common fashion accessories to appear in recent years has been the tiny yapping dog. Made popular by such amazing visionaries as Paris Hilton and Tara Reid, these miniature canines can be found under the arms of popular celebrities and blonde sorority girls across the nation. Their diminutive size makes them ideal for fitting into Gucci handbags, and their constant high-pitched barking ensures that all eyes will be permanently focused on you. They are also quite good at adding a little yellow splash to a sidewalk in order to spruce up the color of an area.
Now, these toy dogs did not naturally occur on their own. They were the result of hundreds of years of selective breeding, in which useful traits (strength, tracking skills, the ability to devour a burglar who has broken into one’s home) were replaced with tiny size and the maximum amount of hyperactivity possible. They are a perfect example of form over function, with the form being that of a large rodent and the function being to run around in circles for several minutes before getting sick on your shoes. Be prepared for constant cooing and shaking of the little dogs whenever such an adorable thing occurs.