The comb-over isn’t the only way that a sadly desperate man can hide his growing baldness from the world. Toupees are a less common, but equally horrible method that can be used, should matters grow dire enough. These artificial hairpieces allow for the illusion of hair by covering up the numerous bare spots on the scalp, and are particularly favored by politicians and TV weathermen. Unfortunately, most toupees look like a dead hamster that’s been clandestinely stapled to the front of the person’s head, so they’re not really fooling anybody.
Some toupee dealers offer a series of hairpieces that are meant to be worn subsequently and which gradually increase the amount of hair. You wear a toupee for the first week that has just a little bit of extra hair, so that it ‘naturally’ blends in, and then switch to the second a week later. This one has a moderate amount of hair, with enough to comb to the side, and then you switch to the next toupee, and the next, until you finally show up one morning with a full head of hair. Your co-workers, family and friends are sure to never notice the difference.