Mall walking is a celebrated pastime in white suburbia. You get up early, head on down to the local shopping center, and spend the next fourteen hours staring at overpriced merchandise through storefront windows. Shoemakers saw this phenomenon, realized there was money to be had, and declared that in order to “properly” ambulate from a J.C. Penny to a Sunglasses Hut to a Cinnabon, you needed a set of Mall Walkers. The shoes retailed at $79.99 (plus tax), and were destined to be the next big thing.
Was there anything different about Mall Walkers to assist in their stated purpose, other than the name? Not really. They were just a pair of ordinary sneakers, and not even a good pair at that. Surprisingly enough, most people seemed to realize this, and the product never really took off like the makers hoped. There were a few soccer moms and mall rats who simply had to have them, however, and gladly shelled out the cash to have the official brand of shoes for people of questionable intelligence. You can even still find many versions involving hush puppies in several retail stores online.